


Home Sweet Home: A Tale of Two Elders

by allineedisaquill



Series: A Tale of Two Elders [1]
Category: Yonderland (TV)
Genre: Christmas, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff, Friendship, Getting Together, Ho-Tan is Trans, Holidays, Romance, Sharing a Bed, Trans Character, VexTan
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-23
Updated: 2017-05-11
Packaged: 2018-09-19 11:00:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9437207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/allineedisaquill/pseuds/allineedisaquill
Summary: In this tale of Ho-Tan and Vex learning what it means to be home, they find themselves and love along the way. Friendship, blossoming romance, and the festive season in a far away fantasy realm.[Takes place before, during, and after 3x09 'It's The Thought That Counts']





	1. Anchored

Ho-Tan has never been so glad to be home, back to her creature comforts and the familiarity of their Chamber. She’s missed her collection of teas, her soft mattress and fine sheets, her luxurious bubble baths, her quills and books.

It’s late, everyone retired to their rooms, and Ho-Tan is propped up on her bed with her bound book in her lap. In it she writes of the events that technically never happened, chronicling them for importance and history should they ever need to refer to them in the future (which they no doubt will). Her favourite quill dances across the page and a few candles flicker, lined up on her windowsill and illuminated against the night backdrop of the lands beyond.

Despite being glad to have her home back, she’d felt closer to her fellow Elders than she ever had before whilst out there in the wilderness. It had been a less-than-ideal situation of course, but one that led to much laughter and, in turn, a sense of comfort and ease. Since that day with the Pipple fruit, Ho-Tan had struggled to re-establish her place amongst the council, but camping by firelight and sleeping beneath the stars she’d felt she’d truly managed it at last.

Her mind worries that now they’ve returned, it will all be reversed.

A knock at her door disturbs her thoughts. She recognises the tap-tap of the knuckles against the wood, however, and a warm smile blooms on her face.

“Come in,” she calls, setting her things aside for the moment.

As she expects, a halo of golden white hair topped with a silly hat peers around her door as it opens. Elder Vex gives her a small smile, steps into her room, and clicks the door shut behind him. He isn’t wearing the white ruff he normally dons, just his shirt and breeches. He stands on the spot, his arms swinging nervously by his sides and his fingers wiggling in his sleeves.

“Did you want something, Vex?” Ho-Tan asks, watching him bemusedly.

He makes a small, frustrated noise in his throat and then clears it, wandering over to Ho-Tan’s bed and perching daintily at the foot of it, next to where Ho-Tan’s feet end. His hands assume their familiar pose and clasp in his lap, a pose she knows he favours as it limits his fidgeting. _He must be nervous._

“I miss being outside, don’t you?” He asks, his earring swinging as he turns to look over at Ho-Tan. His brow is furrowed and his eyes squint a bit, like he’s still processing this particular thought and isn’t quite sure what to make of it.

Ho-Tan takes a second and then nods, lower lip out in a pout. “Yes, I suppose.”

Vex acknowledges her words with a short, quiet hum, then looks away to gaze yearningly out of the window instead. Ho-Tan loses herself in thought as she watches him, the light of the candles making him glow slightly.

During their time away, they had grown particularly close. A few days in and they had begun to seek each other out at night, sleeping side-by-side beneath their robes and spare blankets. After they’d acquired their rabbits, they’d tended to them every day together, making sure they were fed and happy. Those were the times they were alone, away from the other Elders, able to talk about everything and nothing and laugh at each other’s words. Ho-Tan had loved those moments the most. She tries not to think about what that means.

“Maybe it doesn’t mean anything,” she murmurs to herself, not meaning to.

“Hmm? What was that?” Vex questions, turning back to her again.

“Nothing, nothing,” she waves him off half-heartedly.

Vex nods, then his eyes fall to her work and her quill beside her, to her handwriting across the pages. He smiles fondly and picks up her book, thumbing carefully through it and skimming over the words.

Ho-Tan would have minded once, would have snatched it back and never let anyone look at her writings until they were perfected. Now she simply watches him read what she’s written with an unsure tingle in her chest.

“You always were the smart one,” he comments, not looking up.

Her chin dips as her face gets warmer. “Oh, now, I’m not sure about that…”

“Really?” He asks, eyes meeting hers. “I am.” His smile is kind and sincere.

Feeling caught off-guard and rather vulnerable all of a sudden, Ho-Tan draws her legs up to her chest and wraps her arms around them, putting a little distance between her and her friend in the process. She can still feel his body heat seeping through her blankets to her body, though.

“I do miss it,” she says, going back to their first topic. “This place almost feels too big now. There’s too much space between everything, don’t you think?”

“Yes,” Vex nods. “I couldn’t sleep.” At this confession, he stares down at his hands, thumbs rubbing together anxiously. His face is the picture of guilt, like a child that has done something wrong and has just admitted to it.

It becomes instantly clear why Vex sought her out, why he’s now sitting in her room on her bed making small-talk. He wants comfort. He wants her. Ho-Tan is momentarily terrified her heart will beat right of her chest but the thought is turned to pure static when Vex meets her gaze again, eyes soft and utterly lost. He looks exactly how she’s been feeling ever since she got back, and suddenly the answer to this predicament is an obvious one.

Ho-Tan straightens out her legs again and takes the book from his grasp, setting it on her bedside table along with her quill. That done, she shuffles to the left side of her double bed, leaving room for another beside her. She pats the space.

“It won’t be like camping,” she begins, “but you’re welcome to stay.”

She prays her offer will be accepted as Vex regards her thoughtfully, blinking.

“You wouldn’t mind?” He asks warily, frowning.

“Not at all,” Ho-Tan reassures with a smile.

“You’re _absolutely_ sure?”

Rolling her eyes, Ho-Tan tries a new approach and simply opens her arms instead. Within moments Vex moves and rearranges himself within her embrace, almost embarrassingly quickly. He toes off his shoes and swings his legs up onto the bed, facing Ho-Tan who now has a warm armful of him.

She gazes down at his face, hyper-aware of their proximity. “Is this better?”

He looks back up at her, moustache curling as he beams. “Much,” he says softly.

Ho-Tan isn’t sure if he’s aware of it, but she begins to feel a hand rubbing her back up and down in tiny movements, barely a solid touch. All the while he’s there, so close, blue eyes shining up at her with complete openness. His familiar smell of peppermint surrounds her, something she adores even if she hasn’t got the slightest clue as to how he smells like it in the first place.

Swallowing, Ho-Tan lets her head fall back to her pillow, opting to stare at the ceiling and bask in the feeling of every point of contact. Similarly, Vex moves his head too, nestling his cheek against Ho-Tan’s chest before he lets out a tiny, content sigh.

Her stomach flips and this time when she glances down, she just sees blonde hair and a hat. Thinking about it, the latter is very distracting and obstructive, so she plucks it off his head in one swift movement with a pout, putting it down on top of her book as well. She doesn’t give it a second thought.

Vex doesn’t even so much as grumble, but the fingertips grazing her back feel more deliberate now, moving in conscious circles. His hands are a welcome warmth through the thin layer of her night shirt and she can’t deny the little fizzles of electricity that shoot through her spine at his touch.

With the hat gone, Ho-Tan is free to lean over and press her lips to the top of his head. She lingers there, his curls soft against her kiss, and her eyes fall shut. There’s a safety she finds in his closeness that she can’t quite explain. She wishes to savour it, memorise it, never lose it. She’s not even sure when it appeared. Was it when they met, was it during their time devoid of their home, was it sometime in-between? Whenever it was, it doesn’t matter now, because he’s here in her arms and she wouldn’t want to be anywhere else in the realm.

“Thank you,” Vex murmurs.

Anchored to one another, they fall asleep just like that, with Vex's lulling touch at the base of her back and her lips still against his hair.


	2. Pink and Peppermint

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after the night before.

The first thing Ho-Tan registers is warmth, overwhelming and sweet, settled deep within her bones. She’s sleepily aware of the scent of peppermint clinging to her bedsheets and clothes, and the source is nestled against her front.

Tipping her head down, she’s greeted with Vex’s snoozing face, features slack. The lines at the corners of his eyes are less visible, she notes. Curious, she reaches out and thumbs at the corner of his right eye, over the signs of age and wisdom (or lack thereof, usually) and smiles to herself when the man beneath her touch snuffles in his sleep and leans his head unconsciously into it. In the hazy gold of the morning light, Vex looks younger than usual, handsome features drenched in honeyed tones.

“Hmm,” he hums, when Ho-Tan cups his cheek instead, thumb grazing over the slope of his cheek and down at the edge of his moustache. Seconds later, he stirs, and the Scribe watches as he blearily pries his eyes open to peer at her through his familiar squint. He’s soft like this.

“Hello,” Ho-Tan greets quietly, a small, amused smile playing at her lips as she withdraws her hand.

Vex blinks, clears his throat, and remains still. Ho-Tan watches several emotions play out on his ever-open face, so readable and vulnerable. There’s confusion, then embarrassment, melting to bashfulness for a second before that gives away to bubbling nerves and very obvious anxiety. His spooked eyes flit to his hat still sitting on Ho-Tan’s bedside table, then away again.

“Vex?” She probes gently, resting a hand on his arm. She’s familiar with his skittish nature, easily startled and often ridden with quiet stress and disquietude. “You’re alright, it’s just us,” she reassures.

He seems grateful and instantly less tense, looking up at her from his position at her chest. “Quite alright,” he agrees in a slightly wobbly voice.

Ho-Tan quickly concludes it might be more comfortable for them both to reposition, so she pats his arm where her hand still rests there and then uses her other hand to pat the bed beside her, much like she’d done the night before.

“Come up here,” she says calmly and casually.

Vex complies, shuffling up to the space beside Ho-Tan so they lie on their sides facing one another, cheeks to pillows. With a smile on her face, Ho-Tan reaches behind her to grab Vex’s hat, bringing it up and popping it atop his head at their reclined angle. Her smile grows wider when he smiles too, turning to giggles.

“Okay?” Ho-Tan asks around her laughter.

“Yes,” Vex assures, adjusting his hat on his head. “Thank you.”

Ho-Tan shrugs, eyes soft. “I’m always here, you know that.”

It’s true, Vex muses. She was there when Pressley got drunk at one of Vex’s birthdays and ruined the party, she was there when his last relationship ended (he moved to a different realm, broke his heart, Ho-Tan provided many comforting talks late into the night), and she was there when he needed advice about bleaching his hair after he found his first grey strand. She’s always been there, a dear friend by his side, warm and constant. He’s always been so fond.

“You slept alright?”

Vex starts a little, broken from thought. “I did.” He clears his throat. “I hope I didn’t impose…”

“Never,” Ho-Tan reassures. “Not you.”

“Not me?” Vex repeats, eyebrows raised.

“Exactly,” she affirms.

There’s a beat, and then Vex rubs his cheek against his pillow and lowers his gaze with a bashful hint of a smile curving his lips upwards.

“You know, my dear… I do like you.” The unique lilt of his voice is only just above a whisper and his cheeks go a little pink.

Words unexpected, Ho-Tan’s nose wrinkles up as she releases a giggle carried light on her breath. She’d not anticipated this drip of honesty, nor the endearment, but both are welcome and sit happily in her chest and at the crinkles at her eyes.

“Well, that’s fortunate,” she says, smiling, “because I quite like you too.”

Ho-Tan could lie there for a while longer, small talk against soft pillows, but there’s a knock at her door and it’s not nearly as welcome as the one last night or the warmth of her bed and Vex’s closeness.

She sighs and calls out, “Yes?”

Elder Choop’s voice replies through the wood. “Meeting in fifteen minutes,” he informs, not sounding too pleased about it himself. “And if you see Vex, let him know too. He wasn’t in his room and he’s not getting off the hook that easily.”

Ho-Tan’s eyes dart to Vex’s. “If I see him, I’ll tell him,” she calls back. “I’ll just get myself ready.” All the while she’s watching Vex, making no effort to move.

Choop’s footsteps disappear and there’s seemingly nothing left to do but to get up and start their days. Ho-Tan isn’t surprised that Vex breaks the peace first to sit up. A pang of disappointment in her chest, she does the same and swings her legs over the side of her bed to stand.

“Thank you,” Vex says quietly from behind her. “For letting me stay.”

When Ho-Tan turns on the spot, she sees Vex perched on the edge of her bed like he had last night, only his clothes are far more crumpled this morning. She watches as he reluctantly stands, arms swinging by his sides with hands hidden in his sleeves, and takes a few steps towards her door to leave.

She watches his back as he goes. “Anytime.”

Vex stills, fingers wiggling in his sleeves as he thinks for a minute. Then he spins and steps closer, touching a hand to Ho-Tan’s elbow before leaning down to press the smallest kiss to her cheek. It’s wonderfully surprising and Ho-Tan closes her eyes for the brief moment she feels his gentle lips and tickling moustache against her skin. Her heart flutters.

He’s pulling back and stepping away all too soon, cheeks pink and smile shy. “I’ll see you in the Chamber,” he tells her and then makes a swift exit.

Ho-Tan smiles and remains where she is for a brief spell, then shakes her head and begins to get ready for her day.

Thoughts of the past few hours with Vex play in her mind.

The scent of peppermint lingers in the air.


	3. Truths

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Truths are revealed and weights are lifted from two sets of shoulders.

When Ho-Tan enters the Chamber, everyone else is already seated - Vex included. They exchange smiles as she passes him to take her place, opening her book on her lap and twiddling her quill between her fingers as the bubbly chatter goes on around her.

Elder Flowers leans over her, talking quietly. "You're a sly dog, Ho-Tan," he says in a teasing tone. "Don't think I didn't notice."

On the spot and slightly embarrassed, Ho-Tan doesn't look up. "What do you mean?" She asks.

"You and Vex," he replies. "That's why you were late, isn't it?" When he receives silence, he chuckles and pats her leg. "I knew it."

Ho-Tan hisses at him. "It's not like that! He was feeling down so he stayed with me for company. We're good friends." The words feel funny on her tongue. It's not a lie, but she knows her feelings to be more than that, suspects Vex's might be too, and so believes that her statement isn't completely truthful.

"Sure," Flowers says, not sounding completely convinced but dropping the matter for now.

Choop begins the meeting shortly after, reeling off items on the agenda. As usual, the topics aren't of any real importance or relevance to the realm beyond, varying from what they're having for lunch to the issue of Flowers stealing Vex's fabric softener.

"I don't see why you need it," Vex says. "You don't wear clothes enough to excuse it!"

Ho-Tan covers her mouth with her hand, swallowing her laughter.

"Hey, if you guys are gonna make me wear clothes, I wanna be comfortable. Everything's always so itchy." He adjusts his robes to demonstrate his point.

"Well get your own, Debbie gave it to _me_ ," Vex grumbles, quieting when Choop raises a hand.

"Debbie is visiting later," Choop announces. "As I'm sure you're aware, our Thanktival celebrations will begin tomorrow and our Chosen One will be coming to hear our children sing. Consider it our gift to her, one that Chompus can't chomp."

"Ho-Tan's idea," Vex chimes in. He sounds proud. Ho-Tan's cheeks tingle and she ignores the side-eye Flowers gives her.

"Yes, acknowledgement of a good idea where acknowledgement is morally obligated," Choop praises.

"We should invite her to the Thanktival Song Contest!" Pressley suggests excitedly.

Choop waves him off. "Yes, yes, if she likes what she hears. We'll have to see. In the meantime," he continues, "I have the roles sorted for celebrations this year."

Pressley groans in protest. "Can't we hire people to do that?"

"So you can disappear to the Tavern all day? I think not," Ho-Tan says sternly, giving him a disapproving look. "None of us like the chore, but it's our responsibility."

"Precisely," Choop continues. "I'll be taking care of the guest list like every year. Pressley, you're in charge of organising catering and drinks - and make sure you actually leave some drinks for the guests, please. Flowers, you're responsible for the music. That leaves Ho-Tan and Vex," he says. "You're both on decoration."

Ho-Tan is glad that her hair falls over her face as she writes, hiding her pleased smile at this news. The idea of spending the rest of the day in Vex's company sounds very inviting and she's not entirely surprised to find she has butterflies. Of course, Flowers nudges at her with his elbow and she once again ignores him. _Utterly childish._

"Is that all fine, gentlemen?" Choop asks, receiving affirmation from the others.

Ho-Tan's smile drops instantly and she closes her book with a sharp sound. She knows Choop is none the wiser, knows it's not malicious, but the bile rises in her throat anyway. The room is suddenly spinning and her generally happy mood flips like her stomach, disturbing the butterflies which are replaced with dread and distress. Tears blur her vision and the Chamber feels much too small and stuffy, suffocating her where she sits.

She can't leave fast enough, hopping down from her seat.

"Where are you going!?" Choop shouts after her as she flees with her head down and her book tucked under her arm. "The meeting isn't finished!"

"It is now!" Ho-Tan spits out without looking back.

* * *

Vex finds her in the main common room, sitting cross-legged on the plush, deep red carpet in front of the unlit fireplace. On her lap sits her beloved grey and white bunny, let out of his hutch that's placed below the window behind her. Glancing outside, he sees the snow flurrying past the glass and smiles to himself. He loves this time of year, and Ho-Tan is usually so bubbly and upbeat about the holiday season (even if she never gets to open presents) so it's unusual and upsetting to see her now - sad smile on her face as she pets the bunny that nuzzles into her stomach.

"Is everything alright?" Vex asks cautiously, standing awkwardly above her.

He gets no response, just a brief glance of acknowledgement. Vex decides to sit beside her, legs stretched out before him. He reaches over and gives her bunny a loving stroke on the head.

"Did you ever decide on a name for him?" He asks casually, adoring the way the little bundle of fluff leans into Ho-Tan's soft touch. He'd name his own bunny Franklin, but Ho-Tan had never been able to choose something.

He sees Ho-Tan nod in his peripheral. "Mabel. It's a name I read in a book once." 

"Mabel," Vex repeats, the word pleasant to say. "I like it. Franklin and Mabel."

Ho-Tan smiles at the approval but it quickly fades again, and the strained silence returns.

"I can ask Choop to switch roles with someone if you'd prefer," Vex says quietly, unable to mask the wobble to his voice; It's not what _he'd_ prefer.

Ho-Tan looks at him properly this time, seemingly worried he'd think such a thing. "Where did that come from?" She questions, watching him keenly.

"I-- I thought perhaps that was the issue," he mumbles, feeling a little foolish.

She shakes her head, smiling despite her eyes being sad. "It's not, don't think that," she assures to Vex's relief, a warm hand patting his knee a few times.

He tries to ignore the tingle her touch provides. "Then what?" Vex prompts, concerned. "I've never seen you behave that way."

She shrugs. "It's nothing, really." A total lie. Ho-Tan doesn't meet his gaze.

Vex frowns and scoots closer to her so he can wind a comforting arm around her back. "My dear, you can talk to me. I'm always here," he says, echoing her words from the previous night. His thumb brushes the soft fabric of her robes and he feels her tenseness dissipate slightly at the physical comfort.

Ho-Tan sniffles, eyes watering. "It's what Choop said," she reveals, bottom lip jutting out.

"I thought it wasn't about that?" Vex asks, confused.

"Not the job roles," she shakes her head. "After that." She can tell Vex has no idea what she's referring to and she lets out a small sigh, deflating under his touch. "He-- Well. He called us all "gentlemen". That's why I walked out." Ho-Tan chews at her bottom lip after her confession, trying desperately not to burst into tears.

Realisation dawns on the other Elder's face. "Oh," he breathes. "I see." 

"Do you?" Ho-Tan asks defensively.

"Ho-Tan... I know I don't often live up to my title, but I'm not a complete fool. I knew even before you made that wish. Or rather, I suspected."

The Scribe's eyes widen at this discovery. "How?" She asks, unnerved.

"I saw you once," Vex explains. "You were in your quarters and your door was half open. I came to ask if you wanted to join us for a game of charades - it was Flowers' idea and we'd all had cocktails - and you were talking to yourself in the mirror. You were referring to yourself as a lady and you seemed...troubled, and upset."

His words bring the memory flooding back and Ho-Tan averts her gaze as heat stings her face, holding her bunny closer to her chest for comfort. Knowing he'd witnessed that private moment is painful. That day had been a miserable one, full of discomfort and unease. She'd felt like she was suffocating in her own skin and her reflection was that of a stranger's, not her own.

"I've never thought of a way to bring it up delicately. I didn't want to upset you, you see." He adds, "I'm truly sorry."

The apology is unexpected. "Why on realm are you sorry?"

"For seeing something you perhaps didn't want anyone to see. For if you felt alone. We are your friends, practically a family, and you should have been able to confide in us if you needed to."

His kind sincerity is touching and Ho-Tan smiles a tearful smile. "It's not your fault. I've just never been ready to talk about it. It makes me feel so small and _scared_ , Vex."

Vex rubs her arm a couple of times. "Do you think you are now? If not, that's okay too."

Ho-Tan nods in response and takes a deep breath. Vex releases her, then Ho-Tan picks up her bunny gently and stands, walking to his hutch to place him back inside with Vex's. 

They decide that their sofa would be a better place to have this honest discussion and they sit close together on the worn burgundy fabric, bodies turned inwards so their knees almost touch.

"I'm listening," Vex encourages softly.

It's terrifying, utterly terrifying, and Ho-Tan doesn't know how to start other than with the direct truth. So she does just that.

"I'm a woman." Those three words leave her briefly dizzy with alleviation and it's like they open a floodgate of repressed emotion. Suddenly her unshed tears come spilling down and she can do nothing but cover her crumpling face with both hands, heart pounding painfully.

"Oh, Ho-Tan," Vex says, his heart breaking at the sight. He draws her into his arms quickly, tucking her head delicately under his chin. "It's alright. I promise."

It's a relief to rest her weary weight against his front. She's shielded from the rest of the world, cheek pressed to the soft material of his blue robes. Ho-Tan cries and cries until her eyes are sore and he holds her through it all, and she finds that when her tears stop, her mind clears. She stays there for a while more and enjoys the embrace however, letting herself feel the solidarity of support right there beneath herself.

Eventually she speaks, Vex feeling her voice against him. "I'm a woman," she repeats. "I want people to refer to me as such. I want to wear pretty clothes and gloss on my lips and I want my kind of feminine to be okay." She sniffles. "I'm scared people won't accept that, Vex. I'm scared."

Vex frowns and lifts a hand to stroke through the length of her soft hair, sweetness drifting up to his nose at the movement. "People come in all forms here. You might just find they are more accepting than you'd believe, and the people who aren't don't deserve a single moment of your thought. You deserve far better than that." He adjusts so his cheek rests comfortably against the top of her head, closing his eyes and giving her a small squeeze.

"Do I?" She asks quietly, sadly. "I couldn't even keep my wish."

"Yes, you do," Vex says, moving back a little. Ho-Tan is reluctant to meet his gaze but a gentle finger under her chin takes care of that. The lost look in her eyes is heartbreaking; he can't stand to see his friend - his sweet, kind, beautiful and awe-inspiring friend - be so down and out. He shifts his hand to cup her cheek, the gentle pad of his thumb grazing from the apple of her cheek to the high of her cheekbone. 

Ho-Tan sinks into the touch, face threatening to crumble again. She bites her lip to keep it in, eyes shut against a second onslaught of tears.

"You don't need a magic wish to be who you are," Vex says. 

The Scribe opens her eyes, a few tears dripping down. "I don't," she agrees. "I _know_ who I am."

Vex smiles. "It's not your fault if others fail to see that. Just focus on yourself, my dear, and the rest will follow." His smile widens. "And of course you know your fellow Elders will take care of anyone who crosses our paths. They can taste my fists of fury if they want to dance."

The laugh this elicits from Ho-Tan is music to his ears. She grins toothily, eyes crinkling. "I'm sure you'd put up quite the fight," she plays along. "They should quake in their boots." 

"If we listened really carefully, I'm sure we could hear them already," Vex says.

Giggles fill the space between them for a few moments, brightening the room. Vex's hand drops from Ho-Tan's face to clutch at her as they laugh together, momentarily forgetting the weight of the world that currently rests on the Scribe's shoulders.

Vex sobers up first and strokes Ho-Tan's cheek again, and when he speaks his tone is heartfelt. "You deserve all the happiness in the world, you know," Vex tells her.

Ho-Tan searches his blue eyes and finds only truth, his honesty shining through. She lets out a nervous puff of laughter and picks at a loose thread on his robes. "You think so?" She asks. 

"I do," Vex nods solemnly. "You are the most beautiful woman I've ever had the good fortune of knowing, Ho-Tan. You deserve to be the happiest, too."

A wave of love washes over Ho-Tan and she looks up, pouted lips parted slightly in shock. The fingers at Vex's clothes flatten, palm to chest, and the hammer of his heart is plain as day beneath her hand. It matches her own, pulse thrumming throughout her body. She watches him, dazed and unable to quite believe her ears. Vex smiles on bashfully.

For the first time, Ho-Tan realises that she very much wants to kiss him. After Vex's earnest words of affection, a tension has settled, one that sends little fizzles of nervous electricity humming through her bones. His heart hasn't stopped thumping and neither has hers. 

She bites her lip. "Vex?" Ho-Tan prompts, not wanting to spook him. 

Vex treats her to a soft smile. "Yes, my dear?" 

"May I give you a kiss?" Ho-Tan feels his heart skip and watches him swallow nervously. 

He nods, letting out a quiet, "Yes."

Ho-Tan feels like she's moving in slow motion as she leans in.

The first thing she registers is the tickle of Vex’s moustache against her mouth, and the second is how unexpectedly soft his lips are against her own. It’s just a gentle pressure, Vex's own pressing back as he winds his arms around her waist. She delights in how easily she fits into his embrace.

When they pull back seconds later, Ho-Tan rests their foreheads together and closes her eyes.

 


	4. Courageous

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bravery, cake, and Steve.

Ho-Tan concludes that telling the other Elders all in one day will be the best course of action.

"I wouldn't want them to discuss it without me telling them all in confidence first," she had explained to Vex the night before, curled up against his chest.

Vex had agreed, stroking her hair and humming. "Hmm, wise choice. They mean no harm but they are notorious gossips. Especially Elder Pressley after one too many ales."

Ho-Tan had giggled despite herself, earning a kiss to her forehead.

* * *

The morning after, she finds it decidedly less funny.

"You'll be just fine," Vex tells her, watching her from her bed as she paces up and down her room and worries her bottom lip with her teeth. He fixes his ruff around his neck. "Try to relax; they won't have a bad word to say, my dear. They love you."

The Scribe turns on her heel, fearful pout on her face. "You're not the one who has to go around your best friends - your _family_ \- and tell them you're not who they've thought you are for the entire time you've known them. I feel like a fraud, Vex. I feel like a stranger." Her eyes fill up.

Vex is on his feet in an instant, bringing her into an embrace. "You are anything but those things. This is a brave and honest choice, Ho-Tan. This isn't you becoming a stranger, this is our dear friend becoming closer to us. We'll know you better than ever, and we'll love you that way too. Don't doubt that."

Gently, Vex peels back and cups Ho-Tan's face in both hands.

"I'm afraid," Ho-Tan mumbles simply, sniffling.

"I know you are," he says, stroking her cheeks with his thumbs. "But if I know one thing about you, I know that you never let your fears get the better of you. You're the most courageous of us all and I don't believe it will be any different now."

They exchange fond smiles and then they part ways.

* * *

She opts to tell Flowers first. He'd been the first Elder she'd befriended when she had joined the Council. They had always been close, shared a lot, and Ho-Tan is almost certain that he'll be nothing but kind and supportive. He always was, after all.

"As long as you're happy," Flowers says when Ho-Tan is finished talking.

"Oh, I will be," she replies, holding her hands together nervously. "Once I've told the others, I'm sure I'll feel much better. Do you...think they'll understand?" Ho-Tan frowns.

Flowers pats her arm and smiles softly. "Understand? Perhaps not instantly, but they love you, Ho-Tan. Just explain and they'll listen, and then they'll continue loving you. We all will. Like I said, as long as you're happy."

"Thank you, Flowers," Ho-Tan says quietly.

"Anytime, Ho-Tan," her fellow Elder reassures, wrapping her up in a comforting hug.

Ho-Tan smiles in relief into his shoulder. One down, three to go.

* * *

She doesn't plan on telling Pressley next, but it happens that way. Originally she intends to tell Choop, but searching for him in the common room leads her to the Lord Elder instead.

"Ho-Tan!" He calls out, looking up from a list on his lap. "Do you have a moment?"

Politely, the Scribe stops and clasps her hands behind her back. "What is it?"

He huffs, the curl of hair against his forehead shifting with his breath. "Do you think guests would prefer cake or pie for dessert? We don't have the budget to provide both."

"Definitely cake. I've found the children usually prefer it," she informs instantly, adding, "and I do too, if that might sway you." She smiles.

Pressley quirks an eyebrow and looks at her. "I always thought you were a pie person."

She shrugs, hands still clasped. "Well, maybe people aren't always who you think they are."

"Very true," Pressley murmurs to himself, making a note to get cake and not pie. "I once knew a man who turned out to be a horrifying swamp creature. That much whiskey will make anyone attractive." He looks up from his notes, shudders with wide eyes, then goes back to writing. He's oblivious to his friend hovering nervously until she decides to take a seat on the sofa opposite him.

"Could I have a moment too?" She asks, fiddling with the edges of her sleeves.

Her friend meets her eye with a squint. "What's the matter, Ho-Tan?"

Ho-Tan frowns to herself, looking down at her hand as it fiddles apprehensively with Pressley's loose sleeve. She can feel the hot tears pressing behind her eyes, knows they probably look glossy, and she sniffs as her emotions briefly get the better of her.

Pressley notices her upset and shifts his arm, taking her hand in his and squeezing it.

"Whatever's the matter, you can tell me," he urges. "I may be a fool most of the time, but I hope you know I'll always be here when it counts. Is this about you walking out of the meeting earlier?"

"Yes," Ho-Tan replies quietly.

The older Elder hums thoughtfully. "I was shocked, to say the least. Vex insisted on seeing that you were alright," he tells her, and Ho-Tan smiles at the brief mention of Vex. "I have to say, it's not like you to suddenly storm off like that. What happened?"

Ho-Tan braves eye contact, lashes wet with tears. "Choop called all of us gentlemen, when in fact that's not true. I'm not a gentleman." she explains.

Pressley looks entirely confused. "Why? Did you not call someone in the morning?"

"What? Oh. No, it's nothing like that," she says, waving him off exasperatedly. "I'm a woman, Pressley. That's what I'm trying to say. Not a gentleman; a woman."

There's a moment of clarity for Pressley as he realises the truth, and then he smiles widely and squeezes Ho-Tan's hand again.

"Oh, Ho-Tan, I'm proud of you," he gushes, unable to stop himself from pulling her into a tight hug which she accepts with a surprised puff of laughter. "Have you told the others?"

Ho-Tan pats him on the back before pulling back. "Vex was the first I told when he came to see me, and I just told Flowers. I just need to tell Choop and Trevor now." Even saying it, she feels more confident about telling the last of her close friends than she had at the start.

"Don't worry, they'll be fine," Pressley says.

"I know," she affirms, smiling.

* * *

Ho-Tan finds Trevor napping in the main hall whilst looking for Choop.

"Ah, I'm sure he'll find out soon enough," she grumbles to herself as she leaves again.

* * *

In the end, Ho-Tan finds Elder Choop in the entertainment room, lounged watching some addictive daytime show. He twists around sheepishly on the sofa when he hears Ho-Tan enter the room, immediately bringing a bulky telephone covered in brass cogs up to his ear.

"Yeah, Steve," he says coolly. "That's a shame, maybe next year. Bye then!" He pretends to hang up and shoots Ho-Tan a nervous grin.

"Ho-Tan! That was...Steve, he can't make it to the party," he lies.

Ho-Tan rolls her eyes at the obvious deception. "What a shame. Can I talk to you? It's important." She takes a seat on the sofa and picks up the TV remote from beside Choop, turning off the dull show much to Choop's dismay.

Reluctantly, Choop sits up straight and clears his throat. "Go on."

"It's about earlier," Ho-Tan elaborates.

"Ah," Choop nods. "The meeting." He watches her expectantly, hands flat on his thighs.

Ho-Tan tucks the hair dangling in her face behind her ear. "Yes. The meeting." She pauses, gathering her words. "It upset me a lot when you referred to me as a gentleman, because that's not how I feel. You see, I'm a woman, Choop." She swallows after, the seconds ticking by.

Elder Choop opens and closes his mouth a few times, his surprise clear, but then he collects himself and awkwardly shuffles where he sits.

"I apologise, Ho-Tan," he says. "I never would have, you know, if I knew."

The Scribe smiles. "I know that. It's alright, I'm just ready for people to know now," she tells him, and Choop nods again and pats her arm.

"Well, if you're happy, I'm happy," Choop says, moustache lifting with his grin.

"Shall I let you get back to your "work"?" She asks with a raised eyebrow.

Choop gives her another sheepish look and Ho-Tan leaves with a laugh, happy and light. She shakes her head when she hears the TV turn back on behind her.

* * *

"I did it," Ho-Tan announces from the doorway of her room.

Vex is still in there, sat on her bed trying his best to make a list of decorations they'll need to retrieve from their loft to prepare for the party. He looks up at her voice, registering her words and then beaming. He sets the paper and quill aside and approaches her, swinging his arms around her in a warm embrace.

Ho-Tan giggles and buries her head in his shoulder. "It went so well, Vex! You were right, I could do it," she says, her voice ever so slightly muffled by his robes. "I mean, Trevor was sleeping like he does most hours of the day, the lazy oaf, but everyone else was lovely."

The Wise Elder pulls back with such a look of adoration and pride, re-tucking the hair that has fallen from behind her ear during the hug.

"I am so very proud of you," he praises, voice tender. "How do you feel?"

Ho-Tan doesn't bother to hide the tears. "Happy," she answers sincerely. "I feel happy."

Vex kisses her forehead a few times and then meets her eyes. "I'm glad."

She pulls herself together and wipes her eyes with a sleeve, laughing at herself in good spirit. It's then that she spots his list, picking it up from the bed. Her eyes widen and she looks to Vex.

"We haven't even started and the festivities begin in a few hours!" She panics.

"Pep pep pep," Vex hushes her, pecking her lips. "Relax, my dear, we'll be fine."

Ho-Tan folds the list and clutches it tightly in one hand, then grabs Vex's hand with the other to lead him from her room. "Come on then, chop chop! These decorations won't put themselves up, you know."

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first published VexTan fic!
> 
> Find me elsewhere:  
> Tumblr: debbieofmaddox  
> Twitter: @eldervex
> 
> New to VexTan? Confused by this fic? Here are some handy dandy links:  
> VexTan origin posts: [1](http://debbieofmaddox.tumblr.com/post/149420768148/out-of-the-elders-i-think-i-really-could-see), [2](http://debbieofmaddox.tumblr.com/post/150458872103/sparky-nobody-are-we-calling-this-ship-vextan), [3](http://debbieofmaddox.tumblr.com/post/149426215138/some-yonderland-elders-headcanons).  
> My [VexTan tag](http://debbieofmaddox.tumblr.com/tagged/vextan) and [VexTan blog](http://vextan.tumblr.com/).


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